Maybe I should update now...

Things have gotten a little interesting. And not in the good way. Tony and I have separated. Also, I gave birth to our second son last month (and he wasn't there). I'm living with my parents now and currently on maternity leave. I'm dealing with a lot of mixed emotions. Mostly anger, frustration and disappointment. (None of which are new to me).


I'll go into further detail in another post. But for now, I'm basically in survivor mode. Two under two (A 1 month old and a 20 month old) is not easy especially when you're doing it on your own. Yes, living with my parents mean they lend a hand...but that's like 5% of the time. The other 95% it's all on me. 


So yeah. Say a prayer for me. A prayer for strength and a prayer for my sanity.


xoxo

Oh I'm sorry Blog :(

I am SO sorry. I haven't posted in a while. Here's what happened:

1. We moved again, bigger apartment (2 bedrooms)
2. Tony's working, finally
3. Antonio turned 1
4. I got a promotion at work :)

I think that's it...I can't think of much else. I've got a messy house, hungry toddler and a migraine. >.< Doesn't help that he's got a cold and I feel like crapola.

Well, I'm off. He's turning my office chair which means he wants my attention.

<3

A day in my life...

Today, Antonio was not having a good napping day. My fault, I had to go to work and my SIL had errands to run but she took care of him for me so his nap was short this morning. Then I got him in my car after work to go see my aunt and grandmother (since I won't be able to tomorrow). And his afternoon nap was short because he woke up when we got there...refused to go back to sleep when we left and had a complete meltdown halfway home.

So what did I do?

I found the nearest (and safest) parking lot and stopped the car, turned the car off, got Antonio out of his car seat and rocked him until he calmed down. I gave him his afternoon bottle and he was much better.

For about five minutes. Then the screams again.

So I pulled over again in a Publix parking lot and repeated the process. I checked his diaper, I checked the car seat...nothing. He's just fighting his sleep. So I put him back in his car seat and assured him everything was okay. Mama is just trying to get us home. She wishes she could sit in the back seat with you and comfort you but Daddy stayed behind at Tia Jenny's so I have to drive? okay? Sorry, please don't fight your sleep, just take a nap. It doesn't have to be a long one. Just close your eyes and rest? No?? Ahhh, how about country music?? Do you want to hold momma's hand??

And then silence. I cranked up the music a little louder, for my sake because my arm was hurting from being twisted behind me...


I won't lie and say I didn't have my own tears in my eyes because all of his crying made me want to have a meltdown as well because I wanted to be in the back seat comforting him.

But we survived and made it home in time for him to finish his nap and wake up a happy baby. He was so happy he played all by himself when I had to go to a friend's house to visit since she had been super sick for a week. He was giving her smiles and raspberries (that she taught him to do). And loved hanging out in the peace and quiet of her house (plus a trio of running happy dogs to watch).


I'm sure this isn't the last meltdown I'll have to endure while driving...but hopefully next time at least I can climb into the backseat and let him see me there next to him.

Happy Mother's Day...

It's my first one :)

I love being a mom...when I was little it's all I wanted to be (mostly, at one point I wanted to be a doctor who taught other doctors). I would comfort and care for my dolls, never wanting to part with them. (I still have some!) And now...my dream come true. I have my little man. He's so amazing. I still can't believe that he grew inside my belly.

One year ago, he was inside me kicking me as I put my feet in the ocean. This year he'll be putting his feet in the ocean :)

Happy Mother's Day to all Mommies <3

Seven months in...

And I still don't have this whole motherhood thing down yet...

He is just getting into a routine now (now? At 7 months? Tsk tsk on me I know).  Dinner at 5:30pm. Bath around 6ish and bedtime is between 7-7:30pm. Every day. Weekday or weekend. Usually weekends are messed up because we're not home for his bedtime (like now it's after 8 and he's still up).

He is doing new things now...like pulling hair and poking eyes. Not fun for those who are holding him so beware! x_o

He does have his favorite people and one of them is my BIL's grandmother. He loves her. She comes into the room and he is in a fit of giggles wanting to go into her arms. It's too sweet :)

It's pretty amazing...to look at him and to think that he was once inside me growing and kicking (and shoving my organs aside to make room for his long legs).

I can have the worst day...and just one smile from him makes it all melt away.

<3

I'm sorry blog, I've neglected you

You can't really blame me, full time working mama...it's not easy. Plus we have no internet at our place yet.

Nothing is really new except that Antonio is huge! (like zomg! 19lbs and 28in long!) He's 6 1/2 months old, eating solids and trying to crawl. :) He can sort of sit up by himself...he looks like a little puppy though. It's pretty cute. Oh and he blows raspberries. It's too cute to listen to in the morning...(helps that it's cute since it's 6am and I still have 30 minutes left til my alarm goes off).

I went to my first Mommy & Me club meeting today. It was a lot of fun. I've known the mamas since highschool. It's crazy to think that we were in 9th grade 10 years ago O_O. It was fun to talk about babies with someone else who understood what I was going through. Poop explosions? Yep. Getting peed on? Yep. Passing yummy babies around who are lighter than my son? Yep. I had a blast to say the least.

Well I must go, he's in his pack n play trying to tell me he wants out.


<3

Merry Christmas!

It's snowing! :) We are in NC with my parents having blast. Lately Antonio has been having a bottle at 11pm and getting up at 8am! It's awesome to 'sleep in'.

I'll write more when we get back to FL but I hope everyone is having a wonderful Christmas!